“Every day you must unlearn the ways that hold you back. You must rid yourself of negativity, so you can learn to fly.” Leon Brown

We begin learning things the moment we enter this world. As we grow up, we are taught how to act, how to be, right from wrong and so much more. Things today are so much different than they were from when I was growing up. Times have definitely changed.

While most of the things we are taught are extremely valuable, there are many things we need to unlearn. Unlearning requires finding new perspectives and finding new ways to think about established practices. Here are a few things I believe we should unlearn:

  • Trying to change or fix people. It is not your responsibility to change people. Rather, work on yourself.
  • Talking negatively about yourself. We are own worst critics. We are all just doing our best. Give yourself some credit. Stop being so hard on yourself. Give yourself some grace. No one else is you. You will always be incredibly imperfect which means you are perfectly imperfect. Embrace it.
  • Talking negatively about others. We were all taught if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all. That is easy to forget and should not be unlearned. Talking negatively about others, however, should be.
  • Trying to win every argument. While I hate arguing, sometimes it happens. I am not sure why there even needs to be a winner (unless you are in court). You don’t have to win every single time there is an argument or an issue. No one likes someone who always has to be right and can never compromise.
  • Stop with the silent treatment. Start communicating. Use your words. They may be hurtful but holding things in does no one any good.
  • Stop ignoring your needs. You have to take care of yourself. This doesn’t mean just eating right and exercising. Take care of your emotional needs too.
  • Stop wearing yourself out. Start getting enough sleep. Stop working all the time. Start eating better. Start taking your vitamins and drinking more water.
  • Stop believing everything has to be done a certain way. There are all sorts of ways to get from point A to point B. Think outside the box. Change the narrative.
  • You can’t change yesterday. You can ruin today by worrying about it so learn to focus on what’s ahead. Unlearn overthinking.

How do you unlearn? You have to make a conscious choice not to do certain things. You have to be open to breaking the processes. You have to let go of old ideas and cultivate new ones.

When we are kids, we take everything in. Kids question everything. You have to start taking everything in again. Question the things that need unlearned, and decide how to move forward in a healthy, smart way. Unlearn things that are hindering you. You may end up liking the change. As Leon Brown said, “Learn to fly.”

xoxo, Jane Anne

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